Change....

Since the end of January, I've gone through a few changes in my life. I chose to leave one of the ministries I was partnered with. The Lord completely provided and sent me to work at a deli/bakery.

(I walked in because God told me to and got interviewed by the manager...hired within the week as a floor supervisor)

I've became more involved in my church, and God has provided me with a great new growing friendship. It's been great! I heard in my spirit that He was going to do a new thing in 2012...and He has - abundantly so.

Part of my new job is working the register. For some reason whenever the total comes to an exact dollar amount, I get overjoyed. It's so fun to see those two zeros after the decimal!
What about that brings me joy?
   Is it my OCD traits loving the even number?
      Or is there something deep within my being that hates change?

Maybe it's a bit of both.

In reference to the hatred: change is dirty and messy; you can easily lose some - dropping it and it rolling away effortlessly as gravity pulls it away; and it's just heavy.

This is how I view changes in life. It's messy. Someone will most certainly be lost. It's so very heavy on my heart.

I yearn for steady. I desire a home.
I find that in the Lord....but I can't wait until He sees fit to put something in my life that's dependable.

I trust Him as I've stepped off this cliff of uncertainty...learning to fly. But oh, I long for the ground once more.